Our road to Children's Hospital - and our hopeful road out!

So just how did we get here?

Scenes from the last 36 hours flash in front of me, like movie stills.  It's all incredibly surreal.  Slow motion.  Muddy.  Whatever the language is. 

This is getting long and has taken me days to type  - so I'm going to split it up: Our journey to Children's, The ER, The PICU, The Hospital.  They aren't all done yet...but I'll update as I can...at least this provides some information.  I'm really typing this for my records...but as always - feel free to come along on our life journey!

As you know - Oliver finished an antibiotic for an ear infection on Friday, January 22.  On Sunday, January 24, Andy and I thought we noticed some drainage from his tube and he took a rather long nap.  

Monday seemed like an ordinary day.  Monday night Oliver slept, "OK".

Tuesday night Oliver slept, "OK".

But Wednesday morning he seemed off.  He had no fever, no obvious discharge from his ears, however, his breathing seemed a little quick.  We went back and forth, but finally decided to send him to daycare.  We had no real reason not to.  Our instincts are usually correct, so we felt good.  We did start our "Yellow" path on the Asthma plan and started administering 2 puffs of Albuterol every 4 hours.  We even sent him to daycare with the inhaler.  I warned the daycare staff that I thought he seemed off, but besides his breathing, nothing was wrong...so...here we go!

I got to work and started my day.  Around 8:30 I was telling a co-worker about Oliver and as I was, daycare called.  Oliver's breathing was rapid, he was super irritable and fussy, and had a 100.6 temperature.  Not a reason to NEED to be picked up, but they wanted to call anyway.  

Crap, our gut was wrong.  I called Andy and the ped.  Of course, it was Wednesday, which meant that Oliver's ped. was off and we had to see someone else at the practice.  No big deal -- we've basically seen them all.  We went through the routine - what got us to today - ear drainage, rapid breathing, low grade fever - Dr. L listened and agreed his lungs sounded cruddy - ordered an albuterol nebulizer treatment.  She also ordered a liquid dose of Decadron.  My head jerked up and tears welled in my eyes.  I hadn't heard "decadron" uttered since Nic.  Decadron was one of the several medications we used to control Nic's seizures.  Why on earth were they giving it to Oliver?  As it turns out - Decadron is an anti-inflammatory steroid that has several uses.  I backed off the ledge...

Our treatment plan was to give him another dose of the Decadron tomorrow at the same time, increase the Albuterol to 4 puffs every 4 hours, and let this virus run its course.  We also started an antibiotic drop for his right ear infection.  Although Dr. L isn't our primary, I had to ask...or at least bring up...what gives?  I can't keep my son on an antibiotic for the rest of his live long days to treat ear infections.  She said it may be time to discuss removal of his adenoids too. Listen - I'm not all for giving my son unnecessary surgeries...but I'm not also about sitting around and doing nothing and assuming he is going to "Grow out of it".

By the way - can I also mention at this time that I still feel like crap and on top of the pink eye I had last week, I also developed an allergic reaction to my eye antibiotic and was now dealing with that in my eye too.  So I was dragging and putting my own steroids in my eye.  Way to go Bachs - way to go!

Back at home, we put Oliver to bed around his same time, gave him his regiment of drugs and hoped for the best.  

The worst happened.  Oliver was up every 20 - 40 minutes.  No one (except blissfully unaware Eleanor) got any sleep.  Thursday was horrible.  We already had my mom on stand by and she was coming out around 9 AM.  I went to work, Andy went to work, Eleanor went to school and my mom came out.  I checked in with Andy several times, each time asking if we should call the doctor.  After the next dose of Decadron, we decided maybe we should.  We still hadn't seen much change.  The nurse said she'd check with Dr D and would let us know if there was any change in recommendation.  There wasn't.  Let the steroid do it's thing and keep with the albuterol.  Well...the steroid actually did it's thing.  My mom got Oliver to eat a piece of cheese and some cracker.  When I came in at 4:30, Oliver walked to me!  Oddly enough, I had a rogue container of baby food leftover and fed some of that to Oliver for dinner.  I gave him his medication and hoped he'd be back to his lively ol' self in the morning.  

Please also note that at this time, my mom had left - taking MY cell phone with her.  So we dealt with that drama too and decided that my mom and dad would drive the cell phone back to me on Friday morning.  I didn't want Andy driving to meet my parents on Thursday night given how sleep deprived we both were.  

We went into the night with a plan.  Andy and I would both go to bed - when Oliver woke up the first time, we'd respond and assess.  When he woke up the second time, we would divide the remaining time of the night in 1/2.  Andy would take the first 1/2 and I would take the second.  Back to our January 2015 RSV schedule.  Allowing each of us to get some uninterrupted sleep.

Well, Oliver slept until almost midnight.  Andy went in and soothed him...got him back to sleep.  He slept again until 1.  This is when we decided to split the night.  He woke up again at 3, 3:30, 4:45, and up for good at 5.  Andy came downstairs at 6...this is also the time my dad randomly showed up with my phone - surprise!  Andy and I were very concerned as Oliver had no interest in Grandpa, who is one of his favorite people.  Eventually Oliver warmed up to Grandpa, I got ready for work, and left to start my day.  Andy's dad was coming until 12:30, Andy was going to stay with Oliver until 2:30 and I was going to come home when my meeting ended at 2:30 and spend the rest of the afternoon with Oliver.  Grandma and Grandpa Terrones were coming to pick up Eleanor for a sleep over and Andy and I had a sitter for Oliver so we could go on a date!  Well...we cancelled the sitter!

After a really horrible work interaction, I text Andy at 12:30 and asked for an Oliver update.  It wasn't good.  But I really had no idea just how bad it was. 

I had another 2 meetings to attend, but as my 2:30 starting extending past it's 1 hour allotted time, my patience wore out and I got up and left.  I just needed to get home. 

Once home I couldn't find Andy and Oliver. They weren't on the couch - they weren't in O's room - they were both laying in our bed.  This is probably the first mental image that will stick with me forever.  Andy was on his side in our dark room, Oliver was on his back.  He sounded like he ran a marathon.  I went to check and make sure Eleanor's bag was packed and ready to go to Grandma's when Oliver woke up.  I took him from the bed - he was hot and sweaty and breathing SO fast.  With each breath out he would wimper.  I don't know how Andy staid with him like that all afternoon.  I would have lost it.  That sound will forever be in my ears.  

Andy showered quick and I paced waiting for the school bus.  I put on my brave face for Eleanor, talked about her day, talked about the upcoming sleep over, and stared at the clock, counting the minutes until we could go to the doctor.  Upstairs, Andy said he showered and mentally made a list of things he should put together.  He said he just knew where our night would take us.  

As we got closer to 4:30, I ended up taking Oliver to the doctor and Andy waited with Eleanor for Grandma and Grandpa.  

At the office, while we waited, Oliver just laid in my arms.  He didn't care about the fish.  He didn't care about the 2 girls running around.  He didn't care.  

I started telling our journey thus far to the nurse as she put the Pulse/Ox reader on his foot.  Little did I know, it would not be the last time I told that journey.  I got teary-eyed while talking about it.  I just couldn't talk about my poor, pathetic, normally tazmanian son without getting emotional.  As I told the story, Dr. Dan came in.  I was explaining that he hadn't eaten, hadn't drank, and only had one wet diaper that day.  I heard Dan ordering the albuterol, I heard him tell me Oliver is really sick. I heard my voice cracking.  I heard Dr. Dan ask me if he could call someone for me.  I told him Andy was on his way.  At this moment - Andy walked in the door.  We started the breathing treatment.  Dr. Dan came in to check on him and I'll never forget that face.  He turned around and walked out.  He was gone awhile and I knew.  I knew he was calling Children's and letting them know we were on our way.

Oliver's pulse/ox reading was around 90, even with the breathing.  Without, it was around 84.  The threshold is 90.  Low 90s isn't great, but would keep us out of Children's.  97 is  where we want to be.  I can hear Dr. Dan's voice explaining how sick Oliver is.  I can see his face.  But I can't remember the words.  He is telling us we need to go to Children's and he's telling us an ambulance is going to take us there.   He's telling us how scary it will look when the EMTs arrive and strap Oliver to the gurney.  He is telling us how scary it will look to see him loaded into the ambulance.  He is telling us that Oliver is pretty sick.  He is telling us he thinks it's RSV.  I see it all in flashes before my eyes.  But I'm not crying.  I feel almost relief.  I trust our pediatrician and I know Children's is world class.  We are going to the best place possible and they will take care of my baby.  

Andy runs to the car and gets the car seat - one EMT explains the trip to Children's and one EMT and Dr. Dan exchange information.  Oliver's heart rate is over 200.  His  struggling to move oxygen through his lungs.  He's on oxygen right now and not fighting - not resisting.  The lock his car seat onto the gurney and I put him in.  He doesn't struggle or cry...but he watches, cautiously.  I'll ride with Oliver and Andy will follow in the van.  We get wheeled out of the Dr.s office.  I watch myself leaving our trusted Dr...about to meet an entire new team of care providers for Oliver.  I watch us wheel Oliver out of the clinic that we visit on a regular basis.  A place that is so normal and will never feel the same again.  And I see Dr. L, watching us leave, concern in her eyes.  We get outside and I see Andy watching the EMTs load his son into the bus.  I see the sun setting behind him.  I see his eyes red and glassy, I see him swallow hard.  I see him keep it together.  I see the EMTs load my baby into the bus.  I kiss Andy good bye and tell him to DRIVE SAFE and to focus.  I climb into the bus and hear them shut the door.  How is this happening?

Those EMTs....let me tell you.  They all look familiar.  I've seen pictures of them from when the visit daycare and show the kids how helpful they are.  I've seen them at Pick n Save.  I've seen them in parades.  New Berlin may seem like a big city, but I'm constantly reminded how our little section is like it's own little community.  They are wonderful.  They keep me talking.  They keep me informed.  It's a perfect balance.  I see Andy following us in the van.  I see Oliver's eyes rolling into the back of his head...poor kid can never manage to stay awake in a moving vehicle...and yet we need to keep him awake.  

We get to Children's and walk through some hallways...the intake nurse meets us and says, "That's one big 7 month old!"  Apparently there was a little miscommunication there - the EMTs explain O is 17 months!  We get to our room, the EMTs updating the nurses (doctor's? students?  who knows...)  Andy comes in the room.  The one EMT has me sign something...and they leave.  I'm emotional at them leaving.  They've been such a big part of our journey now.  Can't they stay with me?  I'm comfortable with them!

But life is happening quickly and we are on to the next thing.   Like moving rooms to be closer to the doctor's station...